Don’t Make Beginner Professional locksmith Faults. Read Through This Article!

There are a variety of motives the two rates tend not to complement, Garage door installation the majority of them are not excellent. Be sure you talk to them about whether or not the rates varies in case you are caught on the road. In case you are secured away from your vehicle at the pub or a gentleman’s team, give the professional locksmith you call the sense that you operate there. It is rather thrilling to buy a brand new residence and become given more than a collection of keys, but this is certainly the perfect time to bring in a locksmith professional.

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Have a composed calculate prior to deciding to enable any work to be completed.

Significant Important Information Before You Work With A Locksmith professional

With all of this excellent assistance on the all set, your new locksmith is hanging around that you should discover them! If they don’t, don’t hire that locksmith professional! No matter if someone demands an added group of tips manufactured or has to include a locking door for their property, a certified and spring repair skilled professional locksmith may be the person to get in touch with. You want to do this beforehand, prior to actually need them.

Be about the alert for locksmiths who offer quotations merely to elevate them significantly at a later time. This article is stuffed with useful locksmith suggestions. You absolutely want the best possible providers from somebody you know to become reliable. Usually request any professional locksmith you retain the services of for identification after they appear. Even you happen to be using a locksmith professional in a condition where licensing is not required, you need to be harmless and request some kind of recognition prior to permit them to work on your property or car.

Tell them when you are shut by helping cover their a deadbolt or a button fasten, or how many microsoft windows you wish hair installed on. Make certain that any fasten mounted is original and can not be opened with any secrets but those who are in your possession to guarantee your building is protected. If you have, you undoubtedly aren’t improving your security by any means. The website will give you facts about customers’ past experiences with the locksmith professional.

Calling a locksmith after-hours usually expenses more. Whether or not the previous users appear dependable, you don’t want somebody travelling with tips to your property.

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Skating is the best way to get yourself a full body workout. In order to save your knees, make positive changes to running sneakers when necessary. Start small, and make your path approximately a number of mls every day. To accomplish this, but a table underneath you prior to squat. If hockey is your activity and you are planning to improve your soccer ball handling abilities, then training your dribbling whilst using canvas operate gloves.

Getting shoes that are great for appropriately can certainly make a realm of distinction. While you are Calories in an orange by citybook a very good disposition, spend some time to go exercising. To get a far better searching back, you should focus on all of their muscle tissues. Form is essential in lots of the exercises that you are carrying out. You can find activities that everybody could work with and appreciate. To preserve your level of fitness for life, you need to locate types of exercising that you just get pleasure from.

With all the earlier mentioned suggestions under consideration, you may reap the benefits of health and fitness too. Berries are a great way to obtain anti-oxidants, because they can assist you to minimize the amount of unhealthy toxins within your body. There are several types of fitness pursuits for different kinds of folks. Invest in your training session by beginning at the start of the morning.

Best Black Mirror episodes: San Junipero, Bandersnatch, the Miley Cyrus episode

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When it comes to groundbreaking TV, Black Mirror hijacks the conversation. The anthology series explores humanity’s relationship with technology, and it’s Netflix’s prized child. One of the darker episodes sees a nerdy games programmer torture his mean co-workers in a Star Trek-esque virtual reality. With Bandersnatch, Netflix introduced viewers to an “interactive film event,” and used it to make them choose between Frosties and Sugar Puffs. Amazing.

Black Mirror is insane, but great. Some episodes are greater than others. Here’s our ranking of every Black Mirror episode from best to worst, now with episodes from the latest season. (But watch them all regardless, obviously.)


1. Be Right Back

Be Right Back wins based on its original concept and deeply human story. A woman brings her dead husband back to life in android form using his online identity. What a log line. Hayley Atwell and Domhnall Gleeson play the couple, and as Marvel and Star Wars fans now know, they’re incredible. The story explores grief, humanity and the inauthenticity of social media. A soppier Black Mirror about our modern, social media entrenched relationships. It epitomises the best of the show with an ultimate thought-provoking twist ending.


2. The Entire History of You

Another high concept delivered through the lens of relatable characters. In an alternative reality, everyone has implants in their eyes that let you record everything you see. So you can replay memories on a screen and watch exactly how something happened, the implications of which are explored through Liam and Ffion’s relationship. They watch a memory of themselves having sex instead of doing it in real life. The story plays on the paranoia of relationships and the problems of knowing a partner’s history. The Entire History of You is proper Black Mirror car crash TV.


3. USS Callister

USS Callister is just movie-level thrills on TV. An outsider at a virtual reality games company duplicates his colleagues in a Star Trek-esque spaceship. He uses their DNA, cloning their consciousness. He then torments what are effectively real people using God-like powers. Deleting someone’s face so they’re alive but in a constant state of suffocation. Seeing how the characters escape is disturbing and gripping, helped by such high stakes. It’s also funny. A rare Black Mirror that doesn’t end in total misery.

Laurie Sparham/Netflix

4. San Junipero

San Junipero has arguably the best and most memorable characters in all of Black Mirror. Yorkie is a timid, shy newcomer to San Junipero, a party town set in the ’80s. (Incredible soundtrack: check.) She meets Kelly, a party girl, and they fall in love. As their story plays out, we the audience experience the mystery of figuring out where they actually are. This is one of the happiest Black Mirror episodes using technology in a positive way. It also features the best use of Belinda Carlisle’s Heaven is a Place on Earth. You’ll fall in love with it.


5. White Christmas

White Christmas is creator Charlie Brooker’s precursor xnxxxxxx to the multiple storylines of Bandersnatch. Two men appear to be telling stories inside a cabin on Christmas Day. Matt, played by none other than Jon Hamm, tells the story of how his wife “blocked” him in real life with technology that turns her into distorted noise in his eyes and ears only. He also talks about his job and how he duplicates people’s consciousness to create artificial intelligence with the sole purpose of running the ultimate smart home. Not only a look at yet more disturbing Brooker technological creations, Matt’s stories inform the story of Joe, who also gets blocked by his partner. It leads to reveal after reveal for a lovely Black Mirror Christmas. Worth multiple viewings to see the clever tweaks to the set implying not all is as it seems.


6. Nosedive

Joe Wright directs this. He directed Atonement and Pride and Prejudice and brings that same filmic beauty to Nosedive’s cutesy pink and xnxx telugu gold-hued world. It’s essential for the materialistic society created by writers Rashida Jones and Michael Schur. People use their phones to give each other a rating out of five a la Uber. If you don’t appear to be super-friendly and up-to-the-minute in real life and on social media your rating goes down and society shuns you. If its credentials weren’t good enough, Bryce Dallas Howard plays the lead and Max Richter who made the stunning The Leftovers’ soundtrack composes the score. The ending lacks a punchy message but it’s all about the journey and sending up today’s influencer culture.


7. Hang the DJ

Black Mirror on dating. A matchmaking computer system pairs people up for a specific period of time, gathering information from their various relationships until it can find their perfect partner. Some encounters last 12 hours, some five years. Hang the DJ’s relatively simple concept plays on the brevity of Tinder and all the big questions that come with trying to figure out if you’re compatible with someone. A simple yet affecting storyline with a creative take on one element of modern society.

Netflix/Black Mirror

8. Bandersnatch

Black Mirror as an interactive film is some of the most complicated, meta viewing you’ll see. Bandersnatch follows a wannabe games programmer in the ’80s who tries to turn a choose-your-own-adventure book into a video game. Any choice he makes leading up to the creation of the game is determined by us in real life watching on Netflix. It touches on philosophical questions like free will, includes allusions to Alice in Wonderland and is set in 1984. Maybe it’s too gimmicky for some, sexybf but the massive feat of creating multiple endings is as awesome as its inclusion of XTC in the soundtrack.

Pedro Saad/Netflix

9. Striking Vipers

Two of Brooker’s favorite subjects seemingly meld together here in one of the best Black Mirror episodes to come out of the later Netflix era seasons. It takes us down the gravelly, pothole-filled road of video games and relationships. Danny, played by new Captain America Anthony Mackie, rediscovers an old college friendship as well as the video game that used to keep him up all night. In a whole new virtual reality world, it again turns him into a night owl, but for slightly different reasons. An exploration of modern-day relationships, mindsets and — oh, yeah — porn, this episode will take you by surprise.


10. Playtest

Playtest is next-level haunted house storytelling with a specific message to make sure you call your mother. A traveller stuck in London gets a job with a lucrative video game company and playtests their latest horror survival. The virtual reality simulation changes based on his personal fears, and the story comes satisfyingly and disturbingly full circle. It’s directed by Dan Trachtenberg of the excellent 10 Cloverfield Lane, another mix of sci-fi and scares.


11. White Bear

People just stand there and record things with their phones. That apathy is the horror of White Bear, which sees a woman chased down the streets by thugs with guns. She has memory loss and doesn’t know why she’s being hunted. The story manipulates our feelings toward her, until the truth unleashes an avalanche of moral questions on media witch hunts and the public’s hunger for justice. One of the most intense Black Mirrors.

Graham Bartholomew/Netflix

12. Rachel, Jack and xxn Ashley Too

The Miley Cyrus Episode makes full use of the singer’s talents — adding an extra layer to its story about the crazy side of the music world. She plays Ashley O, a singer and teen idol whose management team are intent on exploiting her in every technological way possible. Their next merch idea: a little companion robot with ice cream-pink hair, the same as the stage persona of Ashley O. They call it… Ashley Too. Also voiced by Cyrus, the literal teen idol doles out helpful advice to Rachel, a friendless, motherless teenager, and her punk sister Jack. Some of that advice is actually dance mom coaching, as Rachel learns to shimmy over a chair for her school talent show. Cyrus is good in this episode, stripping back her pop persona in the starker, Black Mirror version of her real-life world. It makes for one of the lighter episodes of Black Mirror, and I’m OK with that.

Stuart Hendry/Netflix

13. Smithereens

If you love Andrew Scott, which you definitely should, then enjoy 70 minutes of Andrew Scott descending into madness. He’s one of the great Irish actors who can pull off a rant about young people glued to their phones any day of the week. He plays Chris, a cab driver who only seems to pick up workers from Twitter-esque social media giant Smithereen. Maybe that name has something to do with the nature of its platform squashing into people’s brains. Chris is clearly on a vendetta against Smithereen, katorsex and through a standoff situation, ends up in a frightening demonstration of how Big Tech can expose our social media lives. It’s not exactly nuanced — Topher Grace is hammily cast as a tech CEO — but it covers ground not yet covered in Black Mirror.


14. The National Anthem

The very first Black Mirror was heck of a story to stomach. In The National Anthem, the UK’s prime minister is blackmailed into having sex with a pig live on national television to save the life of a princess. The realistic take on how the authorities could deal with such a situation keeps you watching despite how absurd it is. It plays on the public’s love of celebrity humiliation a la Big Brother and sets audiences up for the shocks of Black Mirrors to come.

Laurie Sparham/Netflix

15. Hated in the Nation

Bees, tech and murder. That’s pretty much all you need to know about this relatively straightforward Black Mirror episode that takes on the detective procedural format. Hated in the Nation features two female leads trying to figure out how celebrities are dying after being targeted by social media hate campaigns. It’s Black Mirror showing how it can twist an aspect of the media and xnxxxx a current scientific mystery within lower-key genre boundaries.


16. Metalhead

A black-and-white dystopia with a simple but terrifying concept. Ruthless metal dogs chase down humans and kill them. It’s survival horror against Terminator robots inspired by the real-life robots at Boston Dynamics. Metalhead explores the fears of AI going wrong with a surprise sweet touch in the end. Amid the suffering.


17. Men Against Fire

Men Against Fire is Black Mirror exploring the potentially controversial minefield of technology misused in a war zone. A technologically-enhanced soldier in an unnamed foreign country hunts down disfigured enemies who aren’t as they seem. The story touches on the philosophical consequences of technological warfare, but lacks in empathetic characters. It gets ahead of itself with on-the-nose social commentary without a complex enough story to do such a big topic justice.


18. Crocodile

One of the best things about Crocodile is a Pizza Hut self-driving delivery truck just rolling in the background. In a futuristic Scandi noir setting, an investigator uses a special device that lets her look at the recent memories of witnesses to crimes. As she gets closer to piecing together the fragments, one of the witnesses goes to lengths to hide her memories. The high levels of violence make this one of the hardest-to-watch Black Mirrors.


19. The Waldo Moment

The Waldo Moment’s parody of government is so accurate it isn’t funny anymore. An animated blue bear that insults everyone and doesn’t listen ends up in the running in a national election. The story doesn’t have much steam beyond the central premise but its reflection of the current political climate makes it worth another viewing. Black Mirror knew what was coming.


20. Arkangel

Black Mirror venturing into indie movie territory. The focus is on family and helicopter parenting and what using parental monitors, like phone location tracking, can do if taken too far. The Arkangel of the title is a chip parents can implant in their child to not only track and monitor them, but prevent them from seeing potentially disturbing images. That’s Netflix parental controls taken to a new level. While the technology is compelling, its pairing with family drama feels slow and restrained.


21. Fifteen Million Merits

Fifteen Million Merits sends up talent shows and the people who obsess over them. In a futuristic world where the outside doesn’t exist beyond digitised rolling plains and fake rooster calls, unhappy people generate power on their exercise bikes with the sole dream of winning what’s essentially The X Factor. Fifteen Million Merits features an early-in-his-career Daniel Kaluuya of Get Out but it’s the least original of the Black Mirrors, with a final rousing speech to top it off.


22. Shut Up and Dance

Shut Up and Dance is unique for Black Mirror in that it’s a story set in the present. A teenager is blackmailed into committing crimes by a hacker who threatens to release a video of him masturbating. While there are no creative technology ideas, the story leads to a typically ghoulish Black Mirror twist ending that explains the lead character’s desperation. It draws on the fear of personal content going up online but isn’t the most compellingly thoughtful Black Mirror.


23. Black Museum

This is White Christmas 2.0, but with weirder, nonsensical technological concepts. A girl visits Black Museum where the owner tells her about some of the pieces he’s collected. One of them is an implant that lets a doctor feel what his patients are feeling. Another is a man agreeing to have his comatose wife’s consciousness transferred into his own brain. Then there’s a holographic copy of a criminal that can be executed over and xnxz over again by visitors to the museum. This divisive episode derails from realism into the outlandishly macabre and stands out for being as un-Black Mirrorish as Black Mirror gets.

The Way To Take Advantage Of Your Gaming Experience

For your hand, you’ve got three options. You can bet the player hand, the bank hand along with a tie hand. The tie hand is always going to benefit the casino. The home has a 15% advantage over you, although you might be enticed by the payout of actually winning the hand. So do not bet on a tie. Betting on the player hand will give the house a slightly higher advantage than gambling on the bank hand. The bank hand will provide you the best odds of winning. It may seem boring, but the maximum chance of leaving the casino might be exciting.

Blackjack – Card counting. First up it’s important to note that card counting is NOT illegal. However it is frowned upon by casinos and then you may be asked to leave or they will begin shuffling the deck if you are not careful. In casinos the deck IS shuffled after each hand so you cannot count cards online. Youcan actually give yourself a BACCARAT ONLINE edge over the house, by learning how to count cards.

Another strategy that is commonly-known is avoiding to put bets on a tie. Game odds favorable to a tie is 8:1, meaning the odds of winning through tie is close to zero. In actuality, the house edge even has an advantage of 14 percent over a tie win.

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Aside from being available, the slot machines are simple enough to play. No skill is needed in playing as I mentioned earlier. The game’s objective is upon the combination . Normally, there is a mix as simple as chancing upon three identical items on the screen. Even combinations that are not identical amount to something. Hit on the combination and the player takes home the jackpot. This, of course, depends on the system of the slot machine. Press the button to generate the turn and A player just have to insert his money. Slot machines are casino gaming games which require the most wishful and optimistic thinking.

There were gambling players as the rest were mostly kibitzers, although there were plenty of people surrounding the game. They were not actually kibitzers in a sense but casino regulars who’d lost all their money. Why they chose to stick around when they might have taken their much needed rest in the 19, I wondered.

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If you are dealt an ace and a three, which means you get another card, and that card is an eight, you have a total of twelve. Remember, without going over the trick to the game is to get closest to nine. When you go over nine now what happens is the first digit is dropped off the total. Instead of having twelve, you now have two. The dealer is the winner, if the dealer has more than two, but less than nine.

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A roulette strategy that makes the use of Andrucci system is nothing but keeping a track of the past twenty to thirty spins and betting on a number that have seemed.

Traders do the dealing of cards when you play casino games. The dealer deals a set of cards to the banker and to each player. You as a player have the capacity to issue a wager within the tie, which is both hands Before dealing cards. During play, the dealer deals decks of cards from a shoe. Betting takes place before the game so don’t forget yours, begins and put it right after you take a seat.

In terms of how the game itself is played, the difference is in the role of the banker. In the game the players take turns at being banker and the shoe is passed between them. However, in Mini-Baccarat the dealer is the Banker and CASINO BACCARAT the Players never touch the cards.

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To minimize the home edge need to make good, low risk choices. Alcohol makes higher risks attractive, which is exactly what the casino wants to happen. Alcohol isn’t the way to get there, if you’re looking to get the best results while gambling.

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Craps strategy entails placing a wager that you cannot even see on the craps table. You will have access to lots of bets including the proposition bets but rather seriously these ought to be avoided at all costs as they are giving away money.

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Need a break from coronavirus news? How about a terrible, terrible movie?

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I have a problem: I have a long-held and admittedly irrational affinity for terrible movies. And not just any terrible movies — obscure B-movies by no-name directors with big ambitions, painfully small budgets and in-over-their-head actors who are just doing their best with what they’re given. The gems among this craptacular crop of films all share the same tragicomic sincerity and lack of awareness, and they’re typically torpedoed by horrible artistic choices, simple inexperience or a plain ol’ lack of talent. Hey, no one said making movies was easy!

With the help of my trusty roommate Zach, I’ve been combing through secondhand video stores and thrift store bargain bins for years now in pursuit of the most fascinating film fails I can find. We’re well stocked with VHS titles at this point — so, last year, we turned to our motley mix of streaming services to see what the selection is like online.

Netflix? So-so.

Hulu? Nothing of note.

Amazon Prime Video? Pay dirt!

The folks at Amazon wouldn’t comment on their content curation strategy when I asked about it, but for whatever reason, the Prime Video catalog includes an amazing selection of cheap, terrible cinema otherwise lost to the ages. They aren’t well categorized, but with a little digging, it never takes long to find something head-scratching and hilarious.

To that end, here’s a quick sampling of some of the worst and weirdest titles we’ve stumbled across on Amazon’s streaming service, all of which are free for daftsex Prime subscribers to watch right now. Because let’s face it: We could all use a break in the age of the coronavirus — and a few more titles for our watchlists, too.

Now playing: Watch this: The best terrible movies to watch on Amazon Prime


Here’s a little taste of my most recent find, a truly bizarre film about toxic zombies in Florida called Noxious. Our hero is a blue-haired beach bum detective who dresses like a punk teenager for no discernible reason. Cast includes a few too many B-list ex-wrestlers.

— Ry Crist (@rycrist) March 24, 2020

Noxious (2018): 2 hours, 12 minutes


What do you get when you mix a Gulf Coast oil spill, a dash of toxic waste, and a bunch of dead dudes? Apparently, you get one of the strangest and shoddiest movies I’ve ever forced myself to watch (and toxic zombies, obviously).

Why it’s great

The script might be riddled with painful dialogue and bizarre, meandering plot turns, but that didn’t stop its ensemble of misfits from coming together and giving it their best. With a shoestring budget and a cast that features several B-list ex-wrestlers, the acting is just as cringe-inducing as you’d expect. But perplexing performances from the leads — including an aging, tater-tot-loving, blue-haired detective who dresses like a punk teenager from 1993 — will keep you glued to the screen from start to finish. That’s a good thing, because while the monster effects border on semi-competent there, ah, actually aren’t that many zombies in this, um, 132-minute zombie movie.

Watch on Amazon

Circus Island (2006): xxxnxx 1 hour, pakistansex 44 minutes


Fun fact: Feel-good family flicks can be so bad they’re good, too! Case in point, Circus Island, in which an out-of-work trapeze artist slash deadbeat dad falls in love with and marries his ex-wife’s twin sister without realizing who she is before reconnecting with his estranged daughter while fixing up a run-down tropical island as a summer circus camp, wherein an angsty and vaguely homicidal mean girl threatens to ruin everything unless a ghostly circus legend can save the day from beyond the grave. No, it didn’t make much sense when I typed that either (or when I watched it, for that matter).

Why it’s great

See above.

Watch on Amazon

I’m awfully partial to the buddy cop kung fu flick Hawkeye (our VHS copy lists the title as ‘Karate Cops’). The high-kicking hero is so delightfully wooden and obtuse, and his partner’s Eddie Murphy impersonation is surprisingly decent! You know it’s a gem in the first minute.

— Ry Crist (@rycrist) March 24, 2020

Hawkeye, aka Karate Cops (1988): 1 hour, 25 minutes


The ’80s gave us a veritable bounty of bad kung fu movies, but few gave us better schlock than Leo Fong, a Chinese American martial artist, actor, filmmaker and Bruce Lee contemporary who, at 91 years old, is still kicking today. Many will point to his starring turn in the 1986 cult classic Low Blow as a tour de force head-scratcher of a performance, but his turn behind the camera directing the 1988 buddy cop flick Hawkeye (also known as Karate Cops, at least according to our VHS copy) is an absolute must-see, too.

Why it’s great

Let’s start with our titular hero, Alexander Hawkimoto, played by George Chung. He’s a cocksure, karate-kicking cop personified by horrible one-liners, terrible judgment and flat-out wacky Texas cowboy machismo. His partner? A completely shameless (and at times, surprisingly convincing) ripoff of Eddie Murphy from Beverly Hills Cop. The production value? Flimsy at best. The plot? Too ridiculous to describe. The end result? Pure gold.

Watch on Amazon

Powderburn (1995): 1 hour, 22 minutes


“It started out as a routine wife-spying job…” is how the description of Powderburn begins on Amazon. Unfortunately, words really can’t do justice to this baffling masterwork of awful cinema. Suffice it to say there’s really nothing routine about the script’s confusingly bad attempt at neo-noir (think Chinatown, if they only filmed about 30 percent of what they needed and had to try and make it work in editing).

Why it’s great

This film is an enigma of bad moviemaking, and filled to the brim with botched line deliveries, strange cuts and incomprehensible plot twists that’ll have you saying “huh?” more times than you can count. It makes for one of the more demanding watches on this list (and at just 82 minutes, that’s saying something), but stick it out, if only for the utterly bizarre sequence 58 minutes in where our naked hero gets into a gunfight in the desert with a trio of snakes. At least, I think that’s what happens? With Powderburn, it’s a little hard to be sure.

Watch on Amazon

Is this the greatest terrible pun ever to open a movie? I believe that it might be.

— Ry Crist (@rycrist) August 3, 2018

Deathstalker 2 (1987): 1 hour, 28 minutes


The rogueish, casually misogynistic swordsman Deathstalker (yep, that’s really what he calls himself) becomes a reluctant hero when a princess on the run enlists his help in defeating Jarek, the evil ruler who replaced her with an evil twin. 

The duo journeys to confront the villains, but not before a tribe of Amazonian huntresses captures them and forces Deathstalker into a fight to the death as punishment for his womanizing ways (relax, it’s just a WWF-style wrestling match in the middle of the forest, complete with the ring, and that sound you hear is me slapping my forehead just thinking about it).

Why it‘s great

First off, a shoutout to the team at RedLetterMedia, who first turned me on to Deathstalker 2 when they featured it on their “Best of the Worst” YouTube series, which I highly recommend if these sorts of films suit your fancy. Still, Deathstalker 2 merits a full viewing of its own. From the brutally bad pun that opens the film to the final, climactic bout of unconvincing swordplay, everything about this movie is just the best kind of bananas. And don’t worry if you missed the first Deathstalker — it’s available to stream on Amazon, too!

Watch on Amazon

Another recent find: The truly awful and borderline unwatchable Love on a Leash, where a guy trapped in a dog’s body has to get a woman to fall in love with him? Truly one of the most painful watches I’ve ever sat through. Highly recommended.

— Ry Crist (@rycrist) March 24, 2020

Love on a Leash (2011): 1 hour, 25 minutes


Need a romcom for your next stay-at-home date night? Consider Love on a Leash if you’re feeling masochistic. It’s the story of a down-on-her-luck lady who takes in a stray dog, only to learn that it’s actually a man stuck inside of a dog’s body. The two fall in love, and japansex things go from really weird to really, really weird.

Why it’s great

Oof. Or maybe w-oof, I guess. Either way, if you can make it through all 85 minutes of this one, then you’re a true friend of bad cinema. Not only is the script a trainwreck of bad decisions and jokes that absolutely do not land, but the editing and sound design are notably nightmarish, too (my guess is that the filmmakers used a lot of music without owning the rights and then needed to strip it all out prior xnxx to distribution). One note: while the film isn’t too risque, some of the jokes and scenes get a bit suggestive, so stick with Circus Island if you’re looking for something you can groan at with young kids.    

Our hero, the dog, is voiced by a store-brand Seth Rogen type, only to be portrayed by a completely different actor with an entirely different personality when we finally get to see him as a human. Our heroine, a green-obsessed wallflower who makes maddening life choices for the sake of The Plot, veers between overacting and underacting from scene to scene. Very little of this film makes sense. It’s borderline unwatchable. I absolutely love it.

Watch on Amazon

Skyscraper (1996): 1 hour, 35 minutes


2018 brought us Skyscraper, the latest in a long, storied history of Die Hard ripoffs — but did you know it’s actually the second Die Hard ripoff with that name? The first was a straight-to-video trainwreck from 1996, 3gpking and you won’t find Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson saving the day. 

Instead, the John McClane role goes to, I kid you not, the late Anna Nicole Smith, who stars as an unassuming helicopter pilot who lands on an LA skyscraper during a routine charter flight, only to realize that the building has been taken over by violent terrorists who’ve taken hostages.

Why it’s great

This one has it all. The acting is god-awful (I have a special soft spot for Deron McBee’s especially campy turn as a terrorist — you might know him as Motaro from Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, or as Malibu, one of the original American Gladiators). The script is laughably hackneyed (at one point, Smith rappels down the side of the building and kicks through a window, ripping Die Hard off almost shot for shot). And while it doesn’t quite qualify as softcore porn, you should still put the kids to bed before watching — the film includes a handful of jarringly out-of-place sex scenes, including a flashback that literally starts in the middle of a gunfight. 

For these reasons and so, so many more, Skyscraper belongs right at the top of your hall of shame. Sadly, bangla xxx the film isn’t available on Amazon anymore — but you can still stream it for free on Tubi.

Watch on Tubi

Like I said, xxxnxx ( the Prime Video catalog is filled with flicks like these, and that means there’s a lot more where these came from. I didn’t even have room to mention campy classics like Death Spa and Chopping Mall! 

I’m not planning on stopping my search anytime soon, so expect updates to this post if I find any new gems. In the meantime, feel free to share any recommendations for my watchlist in the comments section.